Wednesday, March 26, 2014
FEATHERS? REALLY?! March 24, 2014
Feathers. That’s what Librarian Meredith Vaselaar found when she opened the Adrian Branch Library on Monday, March 24, 2014. She placed a frantic phone call to our fine Chief of Police Shawn Langseth. He arrived at the Library to find a frazzled Vaselaar frantically pacing the floor.
Chief Langseth took a look at the feathers adorning the floor and was flummoxed – what fiends could have left such a fluffy mess? There were no fresh footprints or fingerprints left at the scene. After so many weeks of fractious behavior from the perpetrators, it would indeed have been farfetched to believe the crimes would end.
It was feckless for the Chief to attempt to appease the furious Librarian. “Do not fret,” he advised the Librarian, as filoplumes floated up from her frenetic footsteps, “we shall not be forestalled by this latest folderol!”
Our favorite editor, Kathy Burzlaff, met with Chief Langseth to ask about the latest Library fiasco. “What is your plan to foil these feisty fugitives?” she asked.
“I shall forge ahead, fervidly follow their trails, and never falter in my quest for justice,” vowed Chief Langseth. With a furtive glance around the room, he hinted that he had a fool-proof plan up his sleeve. “The perps can – and will - be fobbed! When that happens, this farce will be finished!” said he, with an intensity that, frankly, flabbergasted this reporter. Indeed, the man seemed inflexible in his determination to bring down the fowl villains.
For you faithful readers and faithful patrons, we ask you to be forthright in your assistance in finding these foxy offenders. Have you any idea who could be causing such furor in our Library? If so, please stop by the Library, or email your suspicions to the Librarian at email@example.com . No feather shall be left unturned in this matter!